Unfortunately, I do find it difficult to resist the temptation to comment in disagreement from time-to-time on some political posts made by others. That is a temptation I really need to avoid. Not that my comments are only on one side of the political spectrum; I’ve commented my disagreement on posts from both the right and the left. But here are the reasons why it is a temptation that I must carefully watch:
1. It seems that many don’t want to hear disagreement, only an echo of agreement. What I have to watch in myself is am I disagreeing just to rock the boat, or is there something I can contribute that can really lead to a better understanding for both us. I need to work on recognizing posts and other comments designed to engage, and recognizing posts made out of passion. The former really do want discussion; the latter do not. Both have their place, but avoiding any comments seems safer. I don’t always succeed in this.
2. I can be just as passionate in my comments as what my friends are posting about. Then it becomes my passion vs someone else’s. No one wins or persuades in those cases.
3. Emotions seem to often outflank (and outweigh) facts or other points-of-view, and choosing to reply can lead to unfortunate results. Sadly, my replies to four people led to their blocking me. I thought I was replying courteously, but in one case I partially agreed but offered up additional information from the source being discussed. I was blocked without explanation. In three others, I offered another point of view without really dismissing the original opinion. Blocked again. I am saddened by this, not just for being blocked but because I made a choice that led to the blocking, and two of the four were the adult children of friends I’ve known since they were born.
4. Some are easier to engage with than others. Some of my long-time friends appreciate differing points of view, and others are miffed at me with even the suspicion of disagreement. I’ve learned that the hard way from experience. But the learning process has been painful. I wish I had discerned the difference better.
5. Wait. In some cases, wait a long while before replying. One of the best conservations I had with someone was over a scripture I had posted. They had been offended by the scripture and commented so. I started to reply, then almost deleted the comment. But finally decided to do nothing. Until several hours later, it came to me what may have been the best thing to say. I didn’t disagree with my friend, instead put into context the scripture I had shared. I wish waiting would be my first choice more often.
All that being said, I love my friends. I remind myself that I don’t love them because we agree politically - in nearly every case, we became friends long before we knew anything about each other’s political ideology. We love because of a lifetime of shared memories, we love because we’re family, we love because of our love for our mutual friends or mutual interests, we love because we serve the same Lord and Savior, and we love because He first loved us.
