Saturday - the in-between day

Saturday - the day in-between:  “As his body was taken away, the women from Galilee followed and saw the tomb where his body was placed. Then they went home and prepared spices and ointments to anoint his body. But by the time they were finished the Sabbath had begun, so they rested as required by the law.” (Luke 23)

“The next day, on the Sabbath, the leading priests and Pharisees went to see Pilate...they sealed the tomb and posted guards to protect it.” (Matthew 27)

“On Sunday, two of Jesus’ followers were walking to the village of Emmaus, seven miles from Jerusalem. As they walked along they were talking about everything that had happened. As they talked and discussed these things, Jesus himself suddenly came and began walking with them. But God kept them from recognizing him.

“He asked them, “What are you discussing so intently as you walk along?”

“They stopped short, sadness written across their faces...Our leading priests and other religious leaders handed him over to be condemned to death, and they crucified him. We had hoped he was the Messiah who had come to rescue Israel.” (Luke 24)

Dreams are dashed. Hope dies. Sadness is written across our faces. We look back on the past few days, maybe just the past few hours or minutes:  “How could things have changed so quickly?” “This wasn’t what I expected when I woke up this morning?”

We don’t have much to read about the day after Jesus died.  We read of the enemies of Jesus, not content with killing him, they conspire to make sure he stays in the grave.

Luke tells a bit about the sadness of the followers of Jesus. They had hoped that in Jesus their dreams would be realized. Now they don’t know what to hope.  Luke also tells us of the women, having just watched Jesus die they set about to help prepare his body for the grave.

Dreams were shattered. Hope was gone. Yet, they still walked. They still talked. They still rested. They still did what needed to be done for the one they loved.

We can look back and think, of course. Look what’s coming tomorrow. But they didn’t have a tomorrow to look back to.

They only had a sunset to face with dreams gone and hopes faded.

But after this sunset, the same questions would come once again:  “How could things have changed so quickly?” “This wasn’t what I expected when I woke up this morning?”

A world turned upside down, and the God who makes all things right.

It was the day before Thanksgiving 30 years ago that my world turned upside down.  There is no need to go into details; those days are long past.  But they are a part of who I am today.  

The Thanksgiving back then was a feeling of a gathering storm, and a desperate hoping it would pass by.  But days later it hit and nothing was left unchanged.  The following December, Christmas, and January held little to celebrate.  Each day seemed to bring more darkness than the day before.  Christmas didn’t feel like a time to rejoice the coming of the King of Kings, but rather a time to wonder if it even mattered.  

 It took many days of the darkness to see that God did care and the newborn King did matter.  My family, hurting as much as me, stood with me.  My family in Christ comforted me and held me close, even when not understanding.  The darkness was still overwhelming until the night I took God with me for an evening walk.

I’ve spoken of this to a few, but have never written it down.  That night, full of frustration, anger, and sadness, I vented to God all that was in my heart.  It must have been a sight to anyone nearby, my one-sided conversation.  Finally, in a burst of self-pity I yelled out loud, “God do you know what it is like to lose your child?!”  The words had scarcely passed my lips when I shuddered with the thought, “My God, what have I just said?”  

And almost instantly I heard God gently answer in my heart, “Yes. I do know.”

The rest of the walk was in silence and tears. Even 30 years later, remembering that moment still fills me with emotion.

That night the darkness began to lift.

I began to see that my faith was not in what I could do about the situation, but in the God who did understand and could make right what was upside down.  

I had wrestled with the Lord and would never be the same.  God has been gracious all these years since. Difficulties still come, but God is always with me and I hear and see reminders of His grace all around me. And I am thankful. Not for the scars, but for the Lord who saw me through, for the world He has brought me to, for the life He has created in me.

Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year holidays still harbor the distant memories of difficult days. But they also remind me that God is with us, and His son the newborn King, Immanuel “God with Us” will never leave us in the darkness.

“The people who walk in darkness

will see a great light.

For those who live in a land of deep darkness,

a light will shine.” (Isaiah 9:2)